My name is Jabba, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are fat, retarded, no-lifes who spend every second of their day smuggling stupid ass spices. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten any slaves? I mean, I guess it’s fun doing the Kessel run in under twelve parsecs, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than jettisoning your cargo when the Empire boards you.
Don’t be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I’m pretty much perfect. I was the leader of a smuggling ring, and wanted crime-lord. What crimes do you commit, other than “punch it, Chewie”? I also feed Pig men to Rancors, and have a banging hot dancing girl (She just choked me; poo-doo was SO credits). You are all nerf-herders who should just freeze yourselves in carbonite. Thanks for listening.